Its been more than a year since i last wrote and we are still in alameda. our big moving plans were redirected, as plans often are. i have grown tremendously nonetheless. it seems my adventure morphed into a more inward search. I found myself in an adversarial role; with myself, my kids, my husband, my lifestyle.
my new road is a slow, winding one. quieting my mind to listen. trying to live in abstract more than intellect. removing plans, lists and hurriedness. (well maybe not lists, yet...)
we unenrolled razi from school after her first year in kindergarten. to allow her room in her days for the same. most people recognize it by the label homeschooling. we're still trying to find the words that fit...life schooling, life learning...
i wake up feeling excited again, like when i was young. curious about what the day will bring. i see how my relationship with my life is how my children model the way they interact with the world.
the other day we went to look for a kids cookbook and found ourselves at the mall. it was hot and they were getting hungry. whining & dragging of feet began. how did i end up here? i thought to myself.
lets sit down on this bench to rest, i said. we sat. they stopped whining and trickled over to the landscaped patch of shrubs and flowers next to bed bath and beyond. 45 minutes later, they were laughing and running through the lavender, crouching in the reeds. acting out an intricate game of make believe. i sat thinking and listening to the light rock permeating from the courtyard speakers. we ended up going home with "fanny at chez panisse" a story of a girl growing up in her mother's restaurant, with her favorite recipes at the end.
we want to try the blackberry ice cream from scratch!